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Sex
In Cyberspace
by Rose DesRochers
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Sex
In Cyberspace
I am rubbing
my keyboard are you rubbing your mouse. Cybersex is it cheating
on your partner? This is a controversial issue, one that has started
a good number of debates across the internet. I would have to say
of course it's considered cheating; you are sharing intimate wants,
needs and sexual fantasies with another person; when you should
only be sharing those needs with your partner. Cybersex is described
as a mediated communication that virtual ourselves with the intention
of becoming turned on; intellectually, emotionally and physically.
The bonds of
marriage are already under so much stress with our world today,
cybersex robs a couple of intimacy and time together. When the best
part of your free time is spent with someone outside of your spouse,
when you would rather be with that person than your spouse, when
that person is the person with whom you share your feelings, your
concerns, your needs and wants, you are cheating, whether or not
you have ever been in a cyber relationship or a totally physically
intimate relationship. It is a physical act. Making love is as much
in the mind and is it is the body and cheating is an act of the
mind just as must as it is our body.
Cheating is
exactly that cheating. It is cheating the person, to whom you have
made a commitment, of loyalty trust love, be it of your mind or
your body. So whether it is on a keyboard, on a monitor, in a conversation
or in a bed, or on the phone breaking the commitment is breaking
the commitment. Cheating is cheating. It destroys the bond of trust
once that trust is lost it the hardest thing to ever get back. Most
people just do whatever makes them happy and have no commitment
to the vows they once made. They feel that they won't get caught
and it no different than that of a movie but your being intimate
with someone over the computer your exchanging words to turn another
individual on. I have to say wake up people both people behind those
keyboards are real human being. There is no train monkey typing
here.
There is more
ways than just one to have sex, than body to body contact .Cybersex
is coming from images of the mind. You are expressing words that
are arousing another. You can rationalize it all you want, "This
is just cybersex, it's not real" or "I'm not emotionally attached
to this person". But if you feel guilty about it, your conscience
is telling you that you're doing something wrong, something that
may hurt the person you're with, offline then you are cheating.
Isn't cybersex just as damaging as picking someone up at a bar and
going home with them?
It's entirely
too easy for us to pretend that the person on the other side of
the chat isn't a real, living, person. Your cyber lover’s heart
can be broken just as easily as your "real life" lover's heart can
be. There's a lot of focus on on-line sex and I think it's really
getting beyond the meet someone, masturbate and type at the same
time routine. It's about relationships and communication, erotic
identity and ideas." trust and betraying the one you’re with.
Is it really
just harmless fun? It’s more than just words being typed on a screen
it comes from images of the mind and if you think the other person
who typing to you just laughing it up, boy are you wrong. It’s also
about the trading of nude pictures too and I guarantee the person
on the other side typing to you does not have both hands placed
on the keyboard .This is just another example where the bonds of
marriage are broken. The internet can be a dangerous thing. Time
for you to really look at the relationship you have and ask yourself
if you really are happy and if you answer no then maybe its time
you ended the marriage, instead of involving another individual
in it.
You can’t justify
your adultery that it is online and not real. Adultery is still
adultery. You cross that line the moment you begin sneaking around
to share intimate thoughts with someone other than your partner.
In cybersex you have secrecy; intimacy and sex are all the same
elements as an affair. If you are having an affair or show signs
of cyber addiction it is now time to talk to a counselor. Marriage
can be beautiful but it takes communication and two people making
it work.
About The
Author
Rose
DesRochers,
admin@todays-woman.net
Rose DesRochers is a published author from Canada Ontario and is
also the founder of www.todays-woman.net
a community for men and women over 18, where writers/poets/columnists
meet and exchange ideas, contest, rate and review and help each
other succeed in the writing industry. Check out Rose's first poetry
book "She is like the wind " here and purchase poetry that is sure
to be a world of emotion on a canvas that is her soul.
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