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I am so confused

 
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What should I do?
Stay with the boyfriend.
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
Go out with the gentleman.
100%
 100%  [ 1 ]
Walk away from them both.
0%
 0%  [ 0 ]
Total Votes : 1

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Thamasea
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Joined: 18 Dec 2006
Posts: 2

PostPosted: Tue Dec 19, 2006 9:32 pm    Post subject: I am so confused Reply with quote

I have been in a relationship for the past 17 months. We fell in love which neither of us intended for that to happen. Our relationship was great for a while. We spend maybe 4-6 hours a week together between his work and my commitments to my two daughters and their sports that is all we have ever had time for. In the last several months I have let him know I want more. I have asked him to go to their events and practices but he is always working or spending time with his son. I have been very understanding to his work and agreed in the beginning adding our children to this relationship should wait until we knew where things were going. But now I am not sure I even want to be with him. I feel like I have had this relationship for 17 months but I spend all my time alone. Everynight I sleep alone except once when he stayed and when we take little trips out of town.
I feel so lonely and I have told him I feel this way. Nothing changed....... Crying or Very sad

I have a good friend that I talk to alot and to my surprise the other day I discovered this gentleman knows me better than my boyfriend does. I have always found this gentleman attractive but have always kept him at arms length. I should say, I never lied to my boyfriend he knows that me and this gentleman are very good friends and that we talk on a regular basis. Over the last year my attraction to this gentleman has gotten stronger and stronger. I have tryed to cut him out of my life and not talk to him but it breaks my heart to do that. He gets along great with my girls and loves them very much. A couple of weeks ago we saw each other and before we parted ways he kissed me and I kissed back. So much for arms length.

I don't want to hurt my boyfriend it's just his inability to be there for me has really played a factor in this, along with my friends who keep telling me I have pretty much been alone for the last year and a half. They keep telling me I need to just walk away from my boyfriend and move on, and if moving on means with this other gentleman who they think will be good to me and my kids so be it they say.

I am soooo lost and confused. Maybe someone from the outside reading this can help me!!!!!!!
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scorpio
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Joined: 02 Jun 2005
Posts: 292

PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 3:49 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hmmm... I guess all I would say... A relationship should always be a happy one. To be together should never be a kind of responsibility but rather to be able to be happy when with one another...

Well, it has been afterall 17 months... one question to be asking yourself, have you truly been happy or... all these while?

Nonetheless, do remember you still have the responsibility of a mum to be playing. Don't neglect your daughters because of all these confusion. Anyway, I know you won't right, Thamasea? Wink
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Thamasea
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Joined: 18 Dec 2006
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PostPosted: Wed Dec 20, 2006 4:25 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Oh no my children come first. They are only 12 & 8 and they are the most valuable people in my life.
As far as being happy no I am not. I have not been for several months. I hoped it would get better but it's not. I don't feel an attachment to my boyfriend anymore. He says he will call and he don't, he says he will come by and he don't. You are so right it all depends on my happiness with the relationship and I am not happy.
So gentleman or not I know I need to walk away. Now I just have to get the courage to end it.
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scorpio
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PostPosted: Thu Dec 21, 2006 5:33 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hmmm... to end it? Well, I wouldn't know...

But you are right, Thamasea. We must always have the courage to fight for what we want, fighting for our happiness...

Do honestly ask yourself, what you want... and with your courage, go for it! Wink
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