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after 2 1/2 years...he does this
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skygirl
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PostPosted: Tue Aug 08, 2006 3:40 pm    Post subject: after 2 1/2 years...he does this Reply with quote

Just 2 weeks ago my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years ended our relationship because he says he only wants a friendship with me. That something is missing and all this only happened within a couple of weeks.

When we met he had only been divorced 6 months before but supposedly she still lived there a couple of months (I just learned this yesterday). He's telling me that we met too soon and went to fast. Now he needs time to be alone to sort things out. To figure out what he wants. He says I'm a terrific girl, 100% devoted, everything he's ever want but he can't open up to me and it's not fair to treat me like that. Ok, understandable, but after you've been together 2 1/2 years? I don't understand that.

Throughout our time together he said that we would marry someday when the time is right...he told me he loved me, we had relations, spent all kinds of time together and now this. I don't understand the timing of this.

He says there isn't anyone else and I never even thought that. He just wants to be friends with me. He doesn't want to lose that because we share a special bond. He doesn't want a relationship with anyone right now. Only friendship.

He's asking me to remain friends...that we can still get together and do things. I don't know if this is what should happen. I don't want to lose him. In 1 way I am hoping that if we stay friends that in the end we will get back together (he says it could happen but he doesn't know if and when that would be). The other way is telling me to forget him. That he will never give himself to me and I should move on.

We didn't have a fight or anything. I am so confused about the timing of all this. How can he just out of the blue do this....we've got way to much time invested and is he throwing that all away? He say's it's not throwing it away if we remain friends.

Whatever his reasons, he feels this is something that he needs to do. I have no choice but to let him have his time.

I feel completely lost. I truly am trying to remain friends because I don't want to lose him in that way either. In the back of my mind I am hoping that after he takes some time that he will want to get back together. Maybe I am crazy for thinking this but it can happen, can't it? Our relationship can be that much stronger then if that should happen.

In your opinions, what should I do? Remain his friend and still keep the hope that we can get back together, remain his friend with no thoughts of getting back with him or move on totally without him in my life at all? I truly feel that I want him in my life 1 way or another because we do get along so well....I am just co sonfused right now.
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JenniB
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Joined: 12 Dec 2006
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PostPosted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 8:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Do whatever you can to move on sweetie.
Cut your losses. I know it hurts. I've been
there. Embarassed
_________________
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desmondtiny
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Joined: 03 Feb 2007
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2007 4:18 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

there is a door youve
never opened
a window that u hav
never seen get there
no matter how long it
takes

oh dark the darkness
that dozes in the dusk
Throw it all away no 1
can burn u no 1 can
tear u, u will live an
endless life forever.
oh dark the darkness
that dozes in the dusk
throw it all away
u see a light wherever
u go
u hav 2 face itagain
and again
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Brandon
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Joined: 25 Jan 2007
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PostPosted: Fri Feb 16, 2007 1:15 pm    Post subject: Re: after 2 1/2 years...he does this Reply with quote

[quote:a3563162a1="skygirl"]Just 2 weeks ago my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years ended our relationship because he says he only wants a friendship with me. That something is missing and all this only happened within a couple of weeks.

When we met he had only been divorced 6 months before but supposedly she still lived there a couple of months (I just learned this yesterday). He's telling me that we met too soon and went to fast. Now he needs time to be alone to sort things out. To figure out what he wants. He says I'm a terrific girl, 100% devoted, everything he's ever want but he can't open up to me and it's not fair to treat me like that. Ok, understandable, but after you've been together 2 1/2 years? I don't understand that.

Throughout our time together he said that we would marry someday when the time is right...he told me he loved me, we had relations, spent all kinds of time together and now this. I don't understand the timing of this.

He says there isn't anyone else and I never even thought that. He just wants to be friends with me. He doesn't want to lose that because we share a special bond. He doesn't want a relationship with anyone right now. Only friendship.

He's asking me to remain friends...that we can still get together and do things. I don't know if this is what should happen. I don't want to lose him. In 1 way I am hoping that if we stay friends that in the end we will get back together (he says it could happen but he doesn't know if and when that would be). The other way is telling me to forget him. That he will never give himself to me and I should move on.

We didn't have a fight or anything. I am so confused about the timing of all this. How can he just out of the blue do this....we've got way to much time invested and is he throwing that all away? He say's it's not throwing it away if we remain friends.

Whatever his reasons, he feels this is something that he needs to do. I have no choice but to let him have his time.

I feel completely lost. I truly am trying to remain friends because I don't want to lose him in that way either. In the back of my mind I am hoping that after he takes some time that he will want to get back together. Maybe I am crazy for thinking this but it can happen, can't it? Our relationship can be that much stronger then if that should happen.

In your opinions, what should I do? Remain his friend and still keep the hope that we can get back together, remain his friend with no thoughts of getting back with him or move on totally without him in my life at all? I truly feel that I want him in my life 1 way or another because we do get along so well....I am just co sonfused right now.[/quote:a3563162a1]

Use your head. Don't follow your heart. I guess if I were you, I would talk with hin (as friends), but don't go to bed with him as friends anymore. Don't let the guy have his cake and eat it too.
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~Angel~
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PostPosted: Thu Feb 22, 2007 7:13 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I think the best thing would be to move on, I will be hard, but it's the best for YOU.

I speak from experience, trying to go back many steps from a relationship to a friendship w/someone you love is very hard. All the time you hang out as friends, talk, etc., it would be hard to not want to be intimate w/him, have him hold you etc.. If he showed you some attention like holding your hand or putting his arm around you for a little bit, you would be thinking that is a step in the direction you want which is to be back together. You would be living your days hoping & wondering when you 2 would get back together while he is spending his time doing his own thing. In the end, the only person to get hurt out of this will be YOU!!
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Brandon
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 3:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Well said.
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Ocean
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 6:35 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Embarassed

Last edited by Ocean on Tue Feb 27, 2007 8:34 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Brandon
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 8:46 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Baby, don't get hooked on me.
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Ocean
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 9:07 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

depends on whom is hooking.. Wink
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Brandon
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 9:25 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I look like a young Mel Gibson and now I'm a hooker. Hmm.. Confused
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Ocean
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 9:33 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

See? how the word hooking can sounds? thats how you put it on me and how it feels too.. so i hope that now you uinderstand what i mean with you talking to me as if i was a hooker... Wink
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Brandon
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 9:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote:87a70e8c5e="Ocean"]See? how the word hooking can sounds? thats how you put it on me and how it feels too.. so i hope that now you uinderstand what i mean with you talking to me as if i was a hooker... Wink[/quote:87a70e8c5e]

Well, never called you one, but isn't that what you are trying to do with me (get me), or should say you are hooked on me?

Stop, Ocean. You are not a hore and you are not a hooker. Just a sweet person that wants love.
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Ocean
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 10:00 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Evil or Very Mad

Last edited by Ocean on Tue Feb 27, 2007 8:34 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Brandon
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 10:14 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

How can you really love someone that you haven't met? Can this really happen?
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Ocean
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PostPosted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 10:16 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Shocked
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