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Funniest First Date Ever...

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Joined: 17 Nov 2008
Posts: 140
Location: SC

PostPosted: Sun Dec 07, 2008 3:31 am    Post subject: Funniest First Date Ever... Reply with quote

Funniest First Date Ever!

If you didn't see this on the Tonight show, I hope you're sitting down when you read it.

This is probably the funniest date story ever, first date or not !
We have all had bad dates but this takes the cake.

Jay Leno went into the audience to find the most embarrassing first
date that a woman ever had.

The winner described her worst first date experience. There was absolutely
no question as to why her tale took the prize!

She said it was midwinter... Snowing and quite cold...and the guy
had taken her skiing in the mountains outside Salt Lake City , Utah .

It was a day trip (no overnight ). They were strangers, after all,
and truly had never met before.

The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed
home late that afternoon.

They were driving back down the mountain, when she gradually began
to realize that she should not have had that extra latte.

They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and in
the middle of nowhere!

Her companion suggested she try to hold it, which she did for a while.

Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow and slow going, there came
a point where she told him that he had better stop and let her go beside
the road, or it would be the front seat of his car. They stopped and she
quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her pants down and started.

In the deep snow she didn't h ave good footing, so she let her
butt rest against the rear fender to steady herself.

Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for traffic and
indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking. All she could
think about was the r elief she felt despite the rather embarrassing nature of
the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon became aware of
another sensation.

As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her
buttocks were firmly glued against the car's fender.

Thoughts of tongues frozen to poles immediately came to mind as she
attempted to disengage her flesh from the icy metal. It was quickly
apparent that she had a brand new problem due to the extreme cold.

Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor of the moment ,
she answered her date's concerns about "what is taking so long" with a
reply that indeed, she was "freezing her butt off" and in need of some

He came around the car as she tried to cover herself with her
sweater and then, as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out

She too, got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose
themselves, they assessed her dilemma.

Obviously, as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced
with a real problem. Both agreed it would take something hot to free her
chilly cheeks from the grip of the icy metal!

Thinking about what had gotten her into the predicament in the
first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to get her free.

So, as she looked the other way, her first-time date proceeded to
unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.... As the audience screamed in
laughter, she took the Tonight Show prize hands down. Or perhaps that
should be "pants down.." And you thought your first date was embarrassing.

Jay Leno's comment... "This gives a whole new meaning to being p.o.'d .

Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was
sitting next to her on the Leno show.
.................................................. .................................................

Now....Tell us about YOUR Funniest First Date Ever... if you have any and if you Laughing
Live, Love Laugh, Sing, Dance, Explore, Dream, Hope, Inspire....Love N Everything...
come check us out..
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Joined: 01 Dec 2009
Posts: 24
Location: United states

PostPosted: Wed Dec 02, 2009 10:37 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

This a great list every post made me Laughing I really cant choose but I love the third one.
I am a psychological counselor and relationship expert. Need Love Advice? Go to:
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Joined: 31 Dec 2007
Posts: 40

PostPosted: Thu Apr 22, 2010 8:32 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote


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Joined: 04 Jun 2010
Posts: 10
Location: Vermont

PostPosted: Fri Jun 04, 2010 9:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

I'm not sure if I'd agree thats truely the [i]worst[/i] first date, however I would definitely say its one of the most [b]awkward [/b]first dates.

I dont't think this is as funny as your example, but this is my story nonetheless:

A few years ago one of my classmates had been discussing online dating services, using it as a means to flirt with me in the middle of a boring lecture. I wasn't sure at the time if he was merely occupying himself to get through the class or if he was genuinely interested until at the end of class he asked if I would like to go on a '[url=ttp://]secretive date[/url]' with him. I asked him what he meant, to which he responded that only he would know the details ahead of time and that I would have to meet him at a subway station.

"Ok, I'll see you there," I said.

A few days later I met him at the train station. Soon enough he walks me in what seems like a giant circle, although he denied it the whole time and we arrive at our destination, a club of sorts. So we go inside and get a drink at the bar as he says there is a show thats about to start.

Keep in mind I was never very into music, but consider myself very open minded. soon enough a rapping contest begins between two people on stage. My date continually seems more and more on edge until finally he says he has to go to the bathroom. About 5 minutes later, he appears on stage as a contestant in the rapping contest. He does his thing for several minutes, claiming to be the best (but not really), and goes off on a long tangent about how in love he is with his date tonight and how he's going to enjoy alcohol, drugs and sex with her tonight.

At the end of his overly forward rap, I was skeptical to start with, until finding out that he lost. At this, he pisses himself on stage and acts like it didn't even happen. Soon enough he reappears and says he wants to go on a walk with me. Being that he was getting funny stares, I was ok with it. It wasn't long until he started grabbing my hand and trying to get me to feel him up where he had pissed himself. At this point I slapped him and walked away, both discusted and offended.

The rest of the semester was fairly awkward having to see him several times a week, but I got through it ok. Fortunately he got the hint and didn't talk to me again after that night.
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