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So Painful

 
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jte23
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 10:43 am    Post subject: So Painful Reply with quote

I don't make many friends online. I chat to a lot of people, I don't take it too seriously and very little ever comes off it.

However, around Mid-March, I began talking to a girl from mainland UK (I live in Ireland). We really hit it off. We had so much in common, talked for hours. This progressed to webcam, video chat, text messaging and phone calls. Our connection was incredible.

We eventually admitted to eachother that, despite never having met, we liked eachother, as much as you can like someone you've never met.

She is an exchange student. She is spending one year in the UK, before going back to Hong Kong. She's leaving for HK on Saturday.

So, because we hit it off so much, she decided to come to Ireland for the weekend and visit me.

I should explain here, i've been out with a lot of girls, both short term and long term. I've experienced love before, infatuation and I know the difference. I don't get carried away easily.

However, the moment we met - CLICK.

We just hit it off. We talked for hours, silences were comfortable and we became really intimate on the first night.

It was amazing. I was just holding her, thinking how amazing it was.

She is really shy, she has not been out with many guys, and therefore it is even more amazing that she felt completely comfortable with me and could be herself.

We never talked about our feelings, but spent all day Friday and Saturday together (getting about 1 hour sleep in that time).

We just couldn't take our eyes off eachother, always holding hands, hugging, talking, kissing or just looking at eachother. I've never experienced such perfection, such a connection, something that felt so right.

I am not saying I love her, or am falling in love - it's totally different. It's way beyond anything i've experienced before. The way i'd imagine it would be to meet your soulmate. I'm not saying she is, but she is really special - i've never met anyone like her.

We never talked about our feelings. For all I know, she doesn't feel the same.

But the way we touched eachother and held eachother was too real. It is the most bizarre few days of my life. I have had many friends and girlfriends, but this is way beyond that, completely different.

And I know you may say, it's only 2 days, but we spent every waking moment together and didn't get bored - so that is like 5-10 dates.

Of course, she goes back to the UK on Monday, and she returns to HK on Saturday.

It is so painful. I have never felt so much pain. The thougths of not seeing her again just kills me.

I need to tell her how I feel. But I am frightened. Maybe she doesn't feel the same connection. I am pretty sure she does, either that or she is a great actress, but naturally I am scared.

Of course, a long-distance relationship is surely not possible.

A few hundred miles maybe. But 6,000 miles extremely Doubtful.

Although admittedly, I would not say no. And I would save up to go see her.

Even so, I don't know what to do.

I have searched my whole life for this. I have fallen in love and had my heart broken more times than I care to mention.

But never have I experienced this. This kind of connection or bond.

Basically, being with her is happiness. And I can't believe she's going to be taken away from me.

Please, help me, in whatever way you can, I don't know where else to turn.
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Razor2865
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 11:00 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

You are that in love...

I suggest you think of other things (just try to) and if it won't help then try to make yourself comfortable like before you were without her or knowing her.

If it won't help, then I can't help you anymore.
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jte23
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Joined: 29 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 11:01 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Hmmmm, you are probably right.

But how can I turn my back on something I have searched for, for so long?
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Razor2865
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 11:05 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote:9403d2577c="jte23"]Hmmmm, you are probably right.

But how can I turn my back on something I have searched for, for so long?[/quote:9403d2577c]

Why not try to think of her for a less time and think of other things than that?
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jte23
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Joined: 29 Apr 2007
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 11:06 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote:7df1e1874b="Razor2865"][quote:7df1e1874b="jte23"]Hmmmm, you are probably right.

But how can I turn my back on something I have searched for, for so long?[/quote:7df1e1874b]

Why not try to think of her for a less time and think of other things than that?[/quote:7df1e1874b]

I wish I could. But I can't.
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Razor2865
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 17, 2007 11:08 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

The only thing I could do if I were you is... think of something else like just praying to her and make him so unworried of you or pray anything for her and it might make you feel better.
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