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Long and bumpy road, with no end in sight. Advice?

 
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shade
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Joined: 09 Jun 2007
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PostPosted: Sat Jun 09, 2007 11:52 pm    Post subject: Long and bumpy road, with no end in sight. Advice? Reply with quote

The story goes like this:

I went to visit my hometown last summer, and I got in touch with some olf elementary school friends. There was this party, and this guy, B. I first met him in first grade, and last saw him in fouth grade. We were both recent high school grads, and well, we'd definitely changed since the age of nine. We hooked up. I was a virgin, and he was real sweet about it. At one point in the night I said 'let's have sex' and he told me it was for the wrong reasons, so we didn't... that night. The next day, he called me and asked me if I wanted to hang out with him after work, I said yes. I was very surprised he called because I felt as though I made a complete fool of myself, offering myself to this pretty random guy, there's also the fact that I broke his nose... somehow? I'm not really sure how that went down. But anyway, we saw each other, and it was an amazing night, and he asked me over the next day too, I said yes, of course. That was the night I lost my virginity and fell in love so hard. I had to return to the place I was staying, and when he walked me back he looked at me like he never wanted me to go, and like he'd never see me again. I went inside, I went to sleep thinking of him. The next morning, I got a phone call from my mother, and she told me I was accepted into a University in my hometown. So right there and then I decided to move back. I didn't move back for him. I moved back because I loved my hometown, and hated where I was living at the time. Anyway, I saw him the next night and told him the news. I slept at his house that night, and the next morning he asked me to be his girlfriend. I said yes. I had to go back to my mom's and prepare to move and all that, seeing as I was going to be moving in like, two weeks. So I moved, and I was happy, and I had a boyfriend, and great friends. A few weeks into the relationship he broke up with me. I didn't get the reason. I was heartbroken. The day after the break up, I found out my mom had been in the hospital. I was on MSN and my name had something to do with my mom's sickness, and he starts talking to me. And we had great conversations for about a month, and it gave me so much hope that maybe we would get back together. Anyway, the first time I saw him after the break up was at my friends b-day bash. He brought this 11th grader, C, from his high school, blonde, smart, and gorgeous. He didn't bring her as a date or anything, just a tag along. But she had a huge thing for him which I knew of. Her and I bonded over a pack of cigarettes and him. She said she was over him, and I could have him. Well. That night, we took turns making out with him, basically. It was... weird. That week I went to C's high school and hung out with her for a couple hours. This became a regular thing. As did her coming to our weekly parties. But she didn't hook up with B, I did. So, B and I had this ongoing hooking up thing. Didn't define it, didn't do anything, really, jsut let it do it's thang. This lasted a few months. My friend from NYC came to visit me, and I wanted both B and C to meet her, so I invited them to my dorm. We drank, talked. Lada lada. Then they shared MY bed. I was awake. I heard the sounds of making out. And I wanted to cry. I think I did. The next morning, I acted perfectly normal. I was pissed at both of them. Her reason? 'I couldn't help it, I like him again.' His? 'I don't remember it.' Liar. Anyway, me being a pushover, I let it go. Only it's haunting me now. And then I slept with him a week later. And there were rumers that he liked me again. Soooo, the three of us and some of out other friends went to MTL for New Years. It was a bad night. I cried in a bar, I made out with C, C and B almost had sex, and I made a fool out of myself, yet again. When we returned home, B and I decided he had to choose. He had to figure out what he wanted. He told me 'I'm fine being friends with you, but everytime I see her, I like her more and more. But I don't know if I'll like her in two weeks.' I responded: 'We aren't friends. Do what you WANT, and don't care about how it affects me.' I even offered to back out of the triangle. But he said no, it was pointless. At least then I would have kept my dignity had I left the trianlge. He made his decision; neither of us. She stopped talking to him, and I continued. I continued seeing him, I continued to fall for him. She got over him, I'm quite jealous of her for that, among other things. About a month later, he started dating this girl, G. She's a sweet girl, not that pretty, but uniquely gorgeous. She's nice, and lives in a town about three hours from our city during the school year, and in France during summer. So her and C had a lng distance relationship. One night, at a party that she obviously was not at, I slept with C. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I know, and I feel guilty, but fxxk. He felt guilty too. He didn't tell her. He told me he didn't blame me when I apologized. After that night, things were a bit awkward, we didn't really talk online, or even when we were with friends. Then she leaves for France. Our friends have no faith in us not hooking up again. But I stopped him the last time wwe were in the position to sleep together or hook up. He had a party at his place, and we were good. We talked a lot, hung out just the two of us, really got along. Then we went to bed. Somehow I ended up sleeping in his bed with him, as everywhere else was already taken because we stayed up significantly later than the others. We did what we always do when we crawl into bed together; cuddle, entangle ourselves in each other, hand in hand. Neither of us slept, just laid there, intertwined. It was actually really nice. Then I felt something... and he got up, went to bathroom, came back got into the same position, then pulled me flush against him and kissed me. I kissed back, then pulled away and said this was dangerous territory. So we resumed our cuddling positions. Was never spoken of again. Now things are pretty okay. I mean, I'm in love with a guy that si pretty much and idiot, and 'taken'. But our friendship is good, I'm just the one in pain, the one with a broken heart. C and B started talking again. They hang out once a week, just the two of them. I get nervous that she's going to start liking him again and vice versa. If that happens, I will hit the roof. I've convinced my friends that I'm over him. But they still have no faith that we won't hook up. Last night I went out with him and our friends, it was good. Really fun. I walked him and his friend to the bus stop, and he said something about being desparate for sex, but I told him he wouldn't be having any on my watch. He said thank you, sincerely. He also mentioned getting an apartment with me and his best friend, but then said that 'no girlfriend of his would let him live with me'.

So I've got a billion questions:

When he kissed me the last time, was it just because he was horny, or did it have something to do with it being me? Same with when we last slept together.

Is it possible that he might still have lingering feelings, or growing ones? Or am I grasping at straws?

Am I doing the right thing in making sure he doesn't cheat on his girlfriend again, or should I just leave it alone, and not get involved further?

Am I pathetic?

Thank you, any response is much appreciated. Also, I apologize for the lengthy-ness.
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Brandon
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 2:42 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

So long as you keep dishing it out, this guy will have his cake and eat it too. You need to find a guy that will love and respect you. One that will think of only being with you and loving only you. Good luck !
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Sara
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 2:56 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote:e5887345a6="Brandon"]So long as you keep dishing it out, this guy will have his cake and eat it too.[/quote:e5887345a6]

Well said Brandon, good advice
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Brandon
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 2:59 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Thank you ! Boy or girl..everyone would like someone like that, am I right, love?
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Sara
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PostPosted: Sun Jun 10, 2007 3:02 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

[quote:e5f1a7c632="Brandon"]Thank you ! Boy or girl..everyone would like someone like that, am I right, love?[/quote:e5f1a7c632]

Yes you are very right
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~Angel~
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PostPosted: Mon Jun 11, 2007 12:44 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

I agree w/what was posted before me.
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Biaxiacop
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PostPosted: Fri Apr 23, 2010 11:48 pm    Post subject: Long and bumpy road with no end in sight Advice Reply with quote

Well it is official, the city can start sticking us with the extra 1/2 cent increase 6 months early, maybe they can use the extra money to pay for the special meeting they called Just couldnt wait to get their hands on it, curious to see how it is used

Do We really need to upgrade the downtown sidewalks? Sorry I know there are thousands of people using them every day.

What is going on with SCHUTT maybe it is a dead issue, sure not much being said about it.

Also see our mulit-million dollar water processing plant is working out, so far have only had muddy water for three days
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