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I need opinions--Age Conflicts. (Please!)
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~Angel~
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Joined: 20 Feb 2007
Posts: 350
Location: USA

PostPosted: Thu May 03, 2007 12:42 pm    Post subject: Re: I need opinions--Age Conflicts. (Please!) Reply with quote

[quote:2d906900a4="LoveViolet"]Hello everyone.. My name is Shane and I have a very important question to ask of you good folks..

I am 18 years old..going to be 19 on the 29th of May, this year. (Soon, I know. =P)

Anyways, there is this girl, Shayna, that I admittedly like. She has a personality that mixes perfectly with mine, is smart, funny, artistic etc. etc. (I won't bore you folks too much here.. =D).

The problem? She is 15 years old..going on 16 in September of this year. (The 11th.)

Now, I am not lying when I say she not only looks older than her age, but she -acts- it. She is very mature..all around her agree and I do as well. We are good friends, and have been for a year..

But now, I am at a crossroads of sorts. No, Shayna and I have **NOT**---1. Had Sex. 2. Kissed 3. Or engaged in any intense physical activity. (A hug or two is about it.) But, from mind to mind, we've shared lots, and that means much more to me anyway.

I am NOT a predator..I am NOT someone who takes advantage of people, young or old. I respect the female gender, and everyone else, WAY too much to do such worthless crap. (To put it bluntly.)

So yes, now I ask you all on this relationship forum... What do I do? Do I either: A. Remain friends. B. Drop her as a friend and remove her from my life completely, to eradicate everything possibly viewed as "questionable" by society..(if it is indeed questionable. I ask that without knowledge of an answer)..or C. Progress with a relationship, but obviously take things slow and carefully..

Thanks for reading. I deeply appreciate your time and your thoughts.
~Shane~[/quote:2d906900a4]

First of all Happy Early Birthday to you! Smile

Second, after reading your posts on here, I would have to say, continue to be friends w/her. From what you posted about that you don't want to take things to the intimate stage until she turns 17/18, basically what you would really have then is a very good, caring friendship. You can still share the "mind to mind" & the hugs, etc. w/her as you are doing now, but w/out the possible pressure of becoming intimate. Now, I do know you typed that you wouldn't put any pressure on her to be intimate, when I meant pressure I meant not from you, but possibly from you BOTH wanting to be closer if you were to pursue a relationship w/her. It would be a natural thing to want to get to that level in a relationships as it progressed. So, in my opinion, continuing on w/your friendship w/her as it is now would be a good idea.

Good luck & take care! Smile
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cdubsbabii
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Joined: 06 May 2007
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PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2007 7:48 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

i don't think it changes anything. my boyfriend and i started dating when i was 17 and he was 20, its not that big of a deal. i think you should just go for it and ask her out.

good luck!
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Brandon
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PostPosted: Sun May 06, 2007 10:22 pm    Post subject: Reply with quote

Good luck ! Very Happy
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Saintly
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Joined: 03 May 2007
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PostPosted: Mon May 07, 2007 5:16 am    Post subject: Reply with quote

Take C.

You're not too old for her, in fact generally women are much more mature than men so an age difference of some type is ideal.

You sound like you are kind, and gentle with her, and all that you will need to do if there is any issue with the relationship with her parents, is show them that, as well as what a lovely, sweet person you are. If you take the time to put their fears to rest you will likely find them very supportive.

Be aware though, and Ocean has covered this a little I think, that she is younger than you, and you may need to be patient with her in the progression of your relationship. I don't think this will be a problem though.

<3 All the best.
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