Love Advice - Single and Lonely

If you find yourself laying in bed at night alone and feeling lonely and wishing that there was someone next to you, take comfort in the fact that most, if not all, single people feel that way at some time or another. It is not at all uncommon, but it can be a problem when it causes you to settle for the first man or woman that comes along in an effort to avoid feeling lonely.

If loneliness avoidance is something that has motivated you to get into relationships in the past, it is important to recognize that this is absolutely not a healthy reason for being in relationship. If you choose to wait for Mr. or Ms. Right to come along instead, you will be getting into a relationship with the right person for the right reasons and then you won't have to feel lonely ever again. You will be with that person for a lifetime. If you don't wait and get into the first relationship that comes along, chances are it will not work out and you will continue to experience periods of loneliness until you learn this important lesson.

Being single does not actually have to mean feeling lonely. Distract yourself from feeling lonely by making it a point to spend time with good friends, take up a new hobby, read the books you've been wanting to read for what seems like forever, watch whatever you want to watch on television whenever you want to watch it, schedule to spend quality time with your children and/or pets on a daily or weekly basis or... doing anything your heart desires while you're single and waiting for the love of your life to come along. We all know that once Mr. or Ms. Right comes along that we will do less of these things anyway as the time once spent occupying ourselves is now spent doing things with our significant other. And, many people find that they really enjoy being single as long as they keep busy with the things that are important to them.

The quickest way out of your loneliness funk if you absolutely can't seem to get out of it is to get out of the house and volunteer! Retirement or nursing homes are filled with lonely people who never have anyone come to visit. You can easily find someone to spend time with who is probably way more lonely than you ever thought of being. Just spending as little as half an hour visiting with someone will end up helping both of you beyond measure. It doesn't matter what kind of volunteering you do, you will feel better because you will have taken the focus off of yourself feeling lonely and put the focus on others and their needs. There is little, if anything, that can be more rewarding than this if you're feeling down in the dumps and need a little pick-me-up.

Warmest Regards,

Lisa Stuart